Learn the Lawg

The Flaws of Claus

2011-12-11T23:10:00.001-05:00

In the legal world, professional integrity is important. This integrity is shaped by how a lawyer presents him/herself, interacts with fellow colleagues, and many other things. According to the American Bar Association's code of professional responsibility, lawyers are not allowed to knowingly lie. Many different types of people live a life of not lying, lawyers included. After all, the words we utter are a deciding factor in whether somebody will trust us. This all leads to the issue at hand "Whether a lawyer loses any integrity when s/he tells a child that Santa Claus exists?"

Although a simple sounding question, it is actually very complex. The question would read better if phrased as such, "What happens when an adult person tells a child that an obese man can travel hundreds of thousands of miles an hour with flying four-legged animals (that do not have wings), has an itinerary of every single child (the likes of which Dateline should investigate), lives in arctic temperatures with his wife and small workers (who have not unionized) and are likely subjected to more human rights violations than grammar rules violated by this sentence?"

Thomas Nast created the modern
plump Santa that many try to look like
in their everyday life.

This question displays multiple mistakes about our society. Here are a few (feel free to highlight some more in the comments section):

1. We teach our children a false science.
This impossible idea shows that a person can defy the laws of physics and survive multiple G-forces with no protective encasement around him in a non-aerodynamic mode of transport. It is also important to mention that Santa Claus is not a relative of Icarus. That is to say, the higher Santa flies above the Earth and thus closer to the sun does not mean he is feeling warmer. To the contrary, it is freezing cold where he flies. Is it any wonder why American students are losing the global competition in math and science?

2. Privacy is not important.
A man has a network that allows him to spy on every child. Now, a child must reason at a rudimentary level, "If Santa can see me while I'm sleeping or awake, then he can see me clothed and undressed." Which must be disconcerting because the child's parents told him that strangers aren't allowed to see him naked. And this same stranger seems to be following him everywhere he goes because whatever store he goes into, this man is making him sit on his lap and tell him what he wants for Christmas. Can we say stalker?

3. This teaches a child poor reasoning skills.
This man is overly jolly, can drink millions of glasses of milk without vomiting (everybody in college knew somebody who tried drinking a gallon of milk in under an hour, never turned out well did it?), can eat hundreds of millions of cookies without getting a stomachache, handle his morbidly obese weight so well that he can squeeze down a chimney (in America, at least, and conform to other cultures as he must when he crosses borders), and has a toy for every Christian person in the world in a toy sack that is roughly about twice his size. As a further point, if this man knows when I have been bad or good and "sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake", then why write him a list of what you want? By right, he should be all-aware and well-aware of what you want!

4. Faith is dispensable.
As the child ages, he'll stop believing in God. Why not? Parents, the harbingers of truth, told the kid that an all-seeing, all-aware being existed. And then, like pulling a rug from underneath a dozing koala bear, that person suddenly doesn't exist and is ripped from the fabric of that child's life.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! A man named Jesus was born on this day.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! His mother was still a virgin after his conception and he came to die for every Christian's sins.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! He wasn't born on this day, he was born in the springtime. Because duh, baby animals are not galloping around in the winter.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! December 25th was chosen because a boat load of pagans had their pagan holiday on this day and the Christians wanted to appeal to them so they switched up Jesus's birth day (no offense, Jesus!).

And, as we know, this was not the only time Jesus was hoodwinked with a quick exchange. He was also partially merged into Santa Claus (along with St. Nicholas, Father Christmas, and Sinterklass.). A child my wife tutors said it best, "I asked my friend what would happen if Santa died. He replied, 'God would make him come back to life and he would live forever.'"

* * * *

I was asked why I don't celebrate Christmas. I replied that I actually do celebrate Christmas, except that I celebrate it as Christmas' namesake would have celebrated it, which means I celebrate it in the spring/summer. Which also means I do not celebrate it because the namesake never celebrated it, rather he simply engaged himself in acts of prayer and self-betterment everyday.

Sometimes, following precedent is not so bad.

Tweet to @salawm

An Undue Process: A Tale of Troy Davis and Anwer Al AwSnap

2011-10-09T14:38:00.000-04:00

It was the best of times.

A convicted murderer of a police officer received his lethal injection after decades on death row. Troy Davis had also shot somebody else and pistol-whipped a homeless person. The police officer was coming to the aid of the homeless person. During his trial, numerous witnesses testified that they had seen him either shoot one guy or kill the other. Pretty solid case. So solid that the jury found him guilty within two hours of deliberations.

Al Qaeda and the Taliban seemed to be on the run, scattering elsewhere and repositioning themselves in Pakistan. The founder of Al Qaeda, Osama bin Laden, was reportedly killed. A leading recruiter of Al Qaeda, Anwar Al-Awlaki, was killed a few months later. The war on terror was seeing major progress.

It was the worst of times.

During the time after Troy Davis's first trial, key witnesses recanted their testimony. One alleged eyewitness, Dorothy Ferrell, was a recanter. You might scoff, "Ah, her testimony could not have been that important if it is easily recanted." Well, I hope you want some sugar in your scoffee because Dorothy testified that she had seen Davis slay a person from her room across the street.

Is that bitter?

Might need more sugar.

Dorothy also said that she felt forced to testify the way she did because she was on parole for a shoplifting conviction and the DA's office had agreed to a plea deal in exchange for her testimony.

She pointed the finger at somebody for murder in exchange for help for a shoplifting conviction? (you can push play now)

(Definitely need more sugar.)

This is the part where a lawyer's/law student's mouth drops.

Truly, it may have been a blunder on the attorneys to not properly look into each witness. These days, finding out that a witness for the prosecution is currently in plea negotiations is something to always look for in order to discredit witness testimony. All the defense attorney has to say is "Oh, hey, jury, check this out: She's only saying this stuff because if she does, SHE will get less time for a crime she committed." Then again, there were 34 witnesses for the prosecution. To look into the background of each one would take an enormous amount of time.

Dorothy was not the only recanter. Three other key witnesses stated they felt pressured to say what they did. Another was threatened to be charged as an accomplice if he did not testify against Troy Davis. Jurors later said if they had known then what they knew now, they would have tried harder in school. They would have also not convicted Troy Davis. Ever.

Everevereverevereverevereverever.

"I'm not actually Atticus Finch,

but I do play him in a movie.

And darnit, PETA, stop thinking

that birds were killed in that movie!

Nothing was killed in the movie.

Well, actually, crap, that's incorrect."

(During some points of that last clause, if you are a true American patriot, you could only see "revere". If, at any point, you saw "evergreen", you are illiterate.)

It seems that a black man was tied to a crime in the South even though the evidence was doubtful.

Boy oh boy, where is Atticus Finch when you need him?

Meanwhile, Osama bin Laden was shot, killed, and thrown overboard into a sea all before President Barack Obama strutted away from the podium announcing that bin Laden was dead. (If you want to read more on OBL, read this entry.) Al-Awlaki had something coming his way. He had just started riding shotgun in a pickup truck and had probably just turned on his favorite Jock Jams volume (to remind him of his good ol days as an American youth) before a missile came out of nowhere and jammed his jock.

Went from listening to "boom boom boom"
to going boom, boom, boom.
What? Too soon, soon soon?

Yes, he was an American. He was born in New Mexico. No matter how vile his actions, no matter how morally reprehensible, he still was entitled to his day in court. The United States had a law in place for acts involving terrorism.

Yes, there was a law in place for exactly what Al-Awlaki did.

It is part of a relatively unknown act called the US PATRIOT Act. Under sections 18 USC 2339A and 2339B (the material support to terrorists and material support to terrorist organizations laws, respectively), these statutes state that if somebody knowingly provides support to a known terrorist or terrorist organization, then he will be imprisoned for, at most, 15 years. If their actions result in the loss of life, then they may receive life imprisonment. The death penalty applies for those guilty of treason, of gathering or delivering defense information to aid a foreign government, or a list of other reasons under section 3591(a)(2).

However, the death penalty can only be given after a trial.

So the case against al-Awlaki was pretty much air-tight. All America had to do was find him, arrest him, and bring him to trial. Yet, a memo within the walls of the White House skipped the steps of due process and stated that he was killable.

Killable, not kill a bill.

The US Government alleges that he could not be captured. One of the reasons he could not be captured was because the US did not want to get stuck in a quagmire of diplomatic relations if US troops touched down on Yemeni soi...sand. (Which the Obama administration may or may not have considered when touching down in Pakistan to take out OBL.) This further makes no sense because Yemen had granted the US permission to fire missiles in Yemen, all the US had to do was ask Yemen if they could pretty please land in Yemen really quick. We are Americans, we are great at going into places really quick.

"Yo, wait up, I just gotta run in and use the bathroom real quick."

It was the age of wisdom.

Judges have an enormous weight on their shoulders. (Some even have an enormous weight on their bellies.) You may remember the following from your elementary school U.S. government course. The judicial branch interprets the laws. Under the judiciary, we have attorneys who are to use the law to represent others. District Attorney Spencer Lawton, the lead prosecutor for the Troy Davis case, adamantly states that there were ample opportunities for the court to overturn the conviction, if it needed to be overturned. In fact, Mr. Lawton informs the public that there were 14 appearances before six courts. The US Supreme Court even ordered an evidentiary hearing in 2009. This meant that defense counsel could present any and all evidence for review by the court. At the end of that hearing, the judge was not convinced. The conviction was still upheld. The judge did his job. He interpreted the law as he saw fit.

Walker, Taliban Ranger

The lawyers who work in the executive branch are some of the brightest legal minds in the nation. They spent a countless amount of hours in researching caselaw to see how to play this out. (Actually, they are lawyers, so those hours are not countless and the appropriate billing amount for the hours worked has been charged.) Plenty of American terrorists had been captured and tried. But no American terrorist ever had a hit on his head. John Walker Lindh was an American citizen and member of Al-Qaeda, but he did not have a hit on his head, he was just captured during a battle. These great brains put their minds together to put together a terrific strategy.

They must have been confident in their findings, because the Department of Defense tracked al-Awlaki for some time and then killed him.

It was the age of foolishness.

Sometimes, upholding the law is blurred with upholding one's self-interests. With Troy Davis, the DA had slam dunked a case; but with witnesses allegedly recanting, things could have ruined this DA's career. Especially once everybody found out about the bits and pieces of evidence the DA may not have disclosed. Or, perhaps the whole Doubt Movement that was to help Troy Davis was all a bunch of foolishness. Davis had multiple tries before multiple courts to have his conviction overturned. If all those courts did not see anything to bring about doubt, then how could the people continue to declare there was doubt? Whereas, on the other hand, if all those people did see everything to bring about doubt, then how could those courts continue to declare that there was no doubt?

The only way a judge can interpret the law is if he has parties before him, which are usually brought by the executive branch. This is because the executive branch enforces the law. Police officers, for example, are under the executive branch. The military also falls under the executive branch (Department of Defense). So, for a court to hear out both sides to al-Awlaki's issues, the military would need to bring him in.

Except that the executive branch decided he did not need to be brought in.

He just needed to be taken out.

And this is where the checks and balances system failed.

The three branches of government are a system of checks and balances on each other, to ensure that one branch does not become too powerful. For the executive branch to bypass the rule of law and order the killing of an American citizen simply bypasses the judicial branch. The proper thing to do would be to capture al-Alwaki, bring him before a court, and let the court takes its course. It seems that the Obama administration went through such a trial in figuring out how they could kill al-Awlaki that it made it okay for that trial to take the place of an actual trial.

It was the epoch of belief.

"Hey, I also sound like I'm from
Baltimore."

Anwar Al-Awlaki was a man with influence. Why? All one has to do is watch his videos. He is not a guy who yells in a loud voice. His beard is not scraggly, but quite thick and full. His voice makes you do a double take. You see a man who looks like he is straight from Arabia, but he sounds like a guy from Baltimore. His speeches talk much about stories that happened in early Islamic history and are even pleasant to hear. Also, he wears glasses that look like John Lennon's glasses. Surely, this guy must be a good guy!

With Troy Davis, nobody knew what to believe. In his court case, the jury believed one thing. In his media case, everybody believed something else. One jury of his peers found him guilty within two hours, whereas the national jury of his peers continued to find him not guilty for two decades.

Maybe if he looked more like her...?

It was the epoch of incredulity.

Anwar al-Awlaki spoke on how much he loved peace and how he wanted all to know that Islam is a religion of peace. That is, until the wars on Iraq and Afghanistan happened. He believed that this was a war on Islam and so, in return, there must be a war on America. It is scary that he could pinpoint the moment when he went from your average peace-loving Muslim to your Osama-bin-HatinAmerica types. More incredulous, still, is that he kind of looks like Bob Saget.

"Good night, Michelle" vs. "Good night, from Hell."

Ok, not really.

He was connected to other domestic terrorists through internet forums. He was connected to terrorism through his subsequent videos denouncing America and calling for jihad. The evidence was clear. But the evidence never had a chance to be seen in court.

For Troy Davis, the evidence was not so clear.

The one thing that continues to be clear is that there was a perversion of justice. A famous quote says

Justice delayed is justice denied.

And what is justice denied? Well, that's something we'd have to ask Troy Davis and Anwer al-Awlaki.

The Summer I Learned to Spit Sunflower Seeds

2011-08-26T09:42:00.000-04:00

It was a dark and stormy night.

Somewhere in the world.

Watch this video

But not where I was. I was in a room stuffed with tables, books, and overworked people. The people were my fellow students. The books were bar review books. The tables, well, you know what tables are for.

Resting your head for a nice nap.

It was 8 weeks into an intensive review of everything law school had taught me (and then some). The final hour was drawing nigh: the Bar Exam. This meant that at least once an hour, somebody would throw a pen at a book because they disagreed with the book’s answer. They could articulate exactly why they disagreed and provide the law for why they disagreed with the book’s answer. They could discuss little legal nuances for an hour with other people in the library, who were also looking for a release. They could do so much but they could not calm down.

I say “they” when I should really be saying “we”.

It was a tough two months to prepare for a “mere” two days. Friends and family members were letting loose with the F word. Not THE F word, rather, the other F word. “You’re going to do fine.” “You’re a smart kid, you’ll be fine.” “When have you not done fine?” “You parked here too long, now you have to pay a fine.” But, we as law students had done our research. We knew that lions before us had fallen victim to the Bar Exam. Lions who did amazing things in the real world, that shaped our country to be what it is today, fell prey to the Bar Exam. Nobody wanted to go through the rigors of retaking the Bar Exam; the physical and emotional stress would be much too much.

So we did what we could. We took the exam. 8,000 people in the Javits Center in New York City. And now we wait until November when the results come. I could not help but think that just outside the building, there were people who were on vacation, visiting NYC for the first time. There were people rushing to work. There were people who just broke up with their boyfriends or girlfriends. People who just experienced death. The world kept on going. No matter how I did on this exam, no matter how I would do later, the world would keep on moving. And that was something that did not make me bitter (because nobody else knew the pain of this struggle), it just eased me through the process. A couple nights before the bar exam, a good friend of mine said, “No matter what happens, we’re all coming out of this alive.” These few words were a powerful sentiment as he said this a few days after the shootings in Norway ended so many lives.

Rock stacks are much better than book stacks

The exam came and went, just as any other 24 hour cycle goes. People even gave birth right after the exam. My wife was waiting after the exam ended. We packed up the car and went to the Adirondacks for a few days. Just a few days prior, I had been surrounded by gadgets and technology. My laptop, iPod, smartphone. All these things I traded in to simply go camping in the woods. Instead of gadgets in both hands, I had my wife’s hand in one, and sunflower seeds in the other.

Both were my wife’s doing.

I agree, too many Disney pics.
But, even Mulan learned to spit.

I had no idea how to spit sunflower seeds. My brain had been crammed with tons of information over a two-month period and I thought I could not put anything else in there. But then I put the seeds in my mouth and all the tensions and stress went away. When camping, chewing on sunflower seeds are an essential, you could say it is a law of the land.

And I had a new law to learn.

Trust me, I have a J.D.

2011-08-07T17:18:00.001-04:00

As soon as law school begins is as soon as law school ends. That is the way it tends to work.

And once it ends, bar review rapidly begins. Sometimes, bar review begins as law school is ending. And when that happens, that means you did not plan your schedule out right for your final semester.

Speaking of planning, what do you plan to do now that the Bar exam is over and while you await your exam's results? This is a waiting period of a few months. In NY, we take the Bar at the end of July and have to wait until Mid-November for the results. That is three and a half months of being suspended in limbo.

Law School purgatory, if you will.

By now, the Bar exam taker has de-stressed to some extent (from taking the exam at least). Life is weird because days filled with studying non-stop are now days filled with doing nothing non-stop.

Well, not exactly nothing

Thousands of law students across the nation are not only stuck waiting for results, but they also cannot find a job. And so, they start googling and binging what others are doing. From the looks of it, people are applying to all sorts of jobs like there is no tomorrow.

In a nutshell, everybody should now be applying diligently to jobs and networking.

Here are some things you should NOT do:

1. Visit forums online
These places are depressing and will only make you feel miserable. Many people are voicing a lot of negativities and it just is not worth your time. Do not do this. You have other things to do.

2. Give Up
Listen bub, you spent three years of your life to get a J.D. to become whatever it is you wanted to be. Do not settle for something so far removed from that goal that it would be very difficult to become an attorney or whatever you want to be. However, if you are having absolutely no luck finding a non-legal job, it might be because you have "J.D." on your resume. Employers may view you and your salary requirements moreso as "high maintenance". But, if you are proud of your J.D. (which you should be), then in your cover letter, let the employer know how that J.D. will help you help them.

3. Sit Around Doing Nothing
This is the worst thing you can do right now. You have to apply, en masse, for jobs. And not just that. You have to network. Major emphasis on networking. Let me show you in font language how much emphasis is on networking: NETWORK! Why? Because employers are getting hundreds of applications, yes, even for the jobs you think nobody would want to do. Who knows if they will ever read your cover letter. But, they might be at the next bar association meeting and they would much rather hire somebody they met in person and had a chance to talk to than filter through email after email and page after page of people talking about how great they are.

Here are some things you should do:

1. Apply to a few jobs a day at least
Keep churning out your resume and cover letter each day. A few a day is better than many at once. You might miss some errors if you churn out too many in a day. For example, in cover letters, always make sure the date is correct.

2. Bookmark webpages
When you find a good site that has lots of potential jobs, then drag the link onto your toolbar and make it a habit to check that daily. I have a few on my toolbar.

3. Conserve resources
By this I mean do not waste money or time. For example, Netflix recently changed its payment plan. If you have both streaming and DVDs, your cost is going to go up. Ask yourself if you really need both services and if you really need the whole thing and if you can go without it for a few months to save some cash. There is always Redbox and the internet at your disposal for cheap or free entertainment. Retail stores keep sending me coupons and sale informations, but, even though I would save a lot of money in purchasing discounted items, I save even more money by not buying anything at all.

I hope this helps and please leave any comments if you have any other helpful tips!

Justice for all?

2011-05-05T13:50:00.009-04:00

Justice is defined as the “fair and proper administration of laws”. For as powerful a word as justice is, it is rarely used in the legal realm. Yet, with the end of one of the greatest manhunts the world has ever seen, this word is a headliner outside the legal realm. President Obama alone used this word five times when he announced that Osama bin Laden had been killed.

The first time he said “justice”, he stated that the attackers would be brought to justice. The second time, he stated that Osama bin Laden specifically would be brought to justice. The third time, he stated that Osama’s death was justice. The fourth time, he said that the Navy Seals worked to pursue justice. And the fifth time, he closed his speech with the final words of the Pledge of Allegiance. Now, everybody and their mother is saying that justice has been done. This leads to the question, has the word “justice” been used correctly?

Obama in his first situation room

A fair and proper administration of law would mean that the Navy Seals had Pakistan’s permission to enter, were instructed to capture Osama bin Laden, hand him over to the proper interrogating authorities, and let due process take its course. President Obama, as a former constitutional law professor, knows this. However, from what news reports are saying, the Navy Seals were never instructed to capture Osama, rather it was a “kill operation” from the beginning. Additionally, reports first said that Osama attacked and now the reports say that he was unarmed and only resisted. How much did he resist? Did it deserve a shot to the head and chest? And ultimately, was there ever any intention of carrying out due process of law?

All kidding aside, is a President the decider?

But, what if killing bin Laden was a good idea? Had bin Laden not been killed, then this would lead to a begrudgingly slow process through the courts. This would parallel what we see today for Guantanamo Bay’s long-term inmates. Advocates for due process and, thus, justice, would argue that capturing and detaining him would not only be proper, but it would be the only option (unless he used deadly force). Yet, on the other hand, if bin Laden went through the court system and was held in prison for even longer than a day, how likely is it that terrorists would have wreaked havoc worldwide? Quite likely, apparently. Although the terrorists would not know where bin Laden was being held, that would be all the more reason to quickly gather, arm themselves, and blow up in whatever public locations they could. Yet, the question is a very dangerous question. This is because nobody knows who gets to make the decision to forgo due process and be the decider. The decision affects the very process that makes America the country with the greatest court system in the world. Whether you raped a hundred people or stole $50, you are entitled to access to the court system.

Burying bin Laden at sea while everybody found out about the news story makes little sense. Whatever area held his dead body for inspection would not have risked the safety of the civilian population. Would any terrorist care to retrieve the body of bin Laden? After all, it is just a dead body. A dead body that no longer serves a purpose to Al Qaeda, which is an organization whose end goal for its soldiers is death. And if the body serves no purpose, then why would they bother with its retrieval? If the answer is that Al Qaeda would need it for an Islamic funeral prayer, then that is incorrect because funeral prayers can happen in absentium. And if the answer is to not create a shrine for terrorists, that is also incorrect because these so-called Muslims do not worship people. They would see that as stepping on worship of God.

Many are happy that bin Laden is dead, saying that he deserved it. Upon hearing this, Gandalf’s words provide great wisdom,

Osama bin Killed

Many who live deserve death, and some that die deserve life - can you give it to them? Do not be so quick to deal out death and judgment. For even the very wisest cannot see all ends.

This is true, it is hard to see what could have been the future, let alone what happened on that night in the Battle of bin Laden Hill. But, imagine seeing Osama bin Laden in handcuffs being escorted to a courtroom in orange prison garb. Imagine seeing images of him sitting at the defendant’s table. Imagine hearing the jury’s verdict. That would have been a fair and proper administration of laws. That would have been justice.

Or does the law of war just screw everything up?

Note: I do not support Osama in any way whatsoever. As a student of law, I care for due process and everybody's right to it. Because everybody does have a right to it. Lawyers may represent murderers and rapists, but that does not mean the lawyer agrees with murder and rape, he/she just wants to carry out due process. I asked an international human rights scholar, "Do you feel that Saddam received due process?" He replied, "I think both of us know the answer to that question."

The World Is(n't) Falling Apart

2011-03-06T14:45:00.000-05:00

I heard the world is falling apart.

Great timing, Mr. Globe. I am in my final year of law school. They were/are tough. They pushed me to the limits and nudged me off cliffs. They kept me awake all night and asleep most of the day. That was law school in a nutshell. Emphasis on the "hell" in nutshell.

But to get to heaven you have to go through hell.

So what does the future hold? Or, more candidly, is there a job market to enter? Yes, I still have one more bout with finals, an epic struggle against the Bar Exam (which is designed to ensure that I, specifically, am guaranteed a most difficult time), and the long (or short) haul of job-hunting. I'll probably meet lots of people for the first and last time when it comes to job interviews. And when I say I, I mean I as a collective to include other soon-to-be-graduating law students that are in the same boat.

This boat is in some treacherous waters, that's for sure.

There are revolutions happening all around the world. Violent, nonviolent, known, and unknown. Gas prices rise. Governments fall. Strikes surge. People try to find some sort of balance to it all. Can we still keep moving forward with all these world events in mind?

Well, we kind of have to move forward, no? Think about it. Thousands of years ago, even just a few hundred years ago, when something happened in China, the British didn't have a clue (and didn't even care).

Sure, the world is much more connected now. But do we still not have that independence? Is this not why President Obama is pushing towards a greener country? It has its benefits of "saving the planet", if the planet really needs saving. (The planet has been around for 6,000 - 4.5 billion years, I think it can keep surviving) [Author is Christian and Science friendly]. But the main benefit is that we would not have to worry about how world events will affect our energy sources. Anything else that is necessary and outside should be moved to our own borders (Apple can stay in China). I think that makes perfect sense.

Even though the sun IS a foreign source of power. (And we wouldn't even have an energy crisis when the sun goes out because we'll die about 7 minutes later).

In the medieval times, when a castle was about to be attacked, the people moved everything that was outside the castle and a necessity to inside the fortress. I think it is time that we move our necessities within our own borders. What I also like is that this attempted energy change is a shoutout to the original Americans (the Natives). They lived off the land and we should be able to as well. It will take some adjustment, sure.

But that is how the American Dream is achieved, through adjusting.

And if the rest of the world falls apart, well, we will adjust to that as well.

O, Rally?

2010-11-02T19:33:00.002-04:00

Washington, D.C. is an important place for a student of law, politics, and/or bribery.

For the any-American, this is the place where so much stuff happens.

This past weekend, America witnessed some other stuff happen, specifically at the National Mall. (For the Erica-American, the National Mall is not a place to spend money on good shoes, rather it is a place to spend time with good views.) To write about this stuff, I took an all-expenses paid trip down to D.C. (By 'all-expenses' I mean the bus ride there and back again, thanks to Arianna Huffington of www.huffingtonpost.com).

The journey to the rally was an experience. I showed up at Shea Stadium at about 5:40 AM, greeted by about 10,000 people. (They all didn't say "Hi Steve!", not that kind of greeting; which would have been inaccurate because my name is not Steve). At least one person was smoking marijuana and he stood several feet behind me. This was not enjoyable because I had not eaten breakfast and all of a sudden I had the "munchies", but I had no food so I became hungrier. Although this would make me grumpy any other time, the secondhand's effect did not let me become grumpy but just made me giggle. (Don't smoke.)

There were delays getting onto the buses, which was expected. My bus left about an hour and a half past schedule and we eventually arrived at the rally at 2 PM. We meandered into the thick of the crowd, which we had no idea held at least 215,000 people. I couldn't see anything, due to my lack of incredible height and the organizer's lack of multiple jumbotrons throughout the field. I couldn't hear much, due to the lack of enough speakers. My predicament was replicated in pretty much everybody next to me, around me, and behind me. So we did the next best thing.

We talked to each other.

We got to know each other.

We laughed at signs and took pictures.

People laughed. Others hugged. Some lady had explosive diarrhea. (Well, that's what she said to get people to give her space so she could leave.)

Truth be told, the rally did not serve much purpose except to just bring us together. Most of the stageshow had musicians playing, which really just served as background music to everything that was occurring, literally, on the grassroots.

Jon Stewart's speech at the rally's official conclusion (not yet unofficially concluded) was very poignant and very direct.

As a Muslim, I very much appreciated when Jon straightforwardly said,

...just as the inability to distinguish terrorists from Muslims makes us less safe not more.

This line, from a person of the Jewish faith, rallying people to not think that Muslims are terrorists was incredibly powerful, given that many people believe there is some sort of Jewish-Muslim hatred (there isn't).

As a student of law, such straightforward speech is so important. Many times, I have read through judicial opinions riddled with fluff or seen legislation that is longer than it needs to be. Other times, people have attempted at communicating by not saying anything, thinking that the recipient will understand what is occurring, to which my professor once told me, "You'll have to tell me, I'm not a brain surgeon." Why take the long road when the easy road is so much more short and direct (and gas is like 3 bucks a gallon now).

As an American, I was thankful to hear Jon say,

We hear every damn day about how fragile our country is—on the brink of catastrophe—torn by polarizing hate and how it’s a shame that we can’t work together to get things done, but the truth is we do. We work together to get things done every damn day!

Save for the rare few who continually gripe and moan about this or that, the rest of us do get along (can't spell USA without "us"). Unfortunately, such behavior is not seen, as Stewart stated, in D.C. Is it an age thing? Is the nation held back because the Constitution requires Senators and Representatives and Presidents to be of a certain age?

Maybe.

As a human, I was thankful to hear Jon say,

But we live now in hard times, not end times.

The economy is dropping, unemployment is rising, and with it, nothing is remaining constant (except for the index finger pointing at and blaming Obama). The majority of Americans have been affected by all these troubles. Yet, we try harder to make it so that this is not an end.

And that's what matters.

That's what keeps us sane.

Hakuna Mattorney

2010-10-04T01:36:00.000-04:00

When one has committed oneself in becoming a lawyer, one's life is changed forever. As soon as the person steps into law school, s/he can no longer think as a regular person. This is not a 100% voluntary change because it happens both slowly and rapidly at the same time. News reports no longer tell about beatings and shootings, they talk about torts and elements. When a lawyer wants to move to a different state, s/he takes into account what the state's bar is like before ultimately deciding on the move. Even movies are no longer safe. Watching a courtroom drama unfold makes you think of whether or not the script is accurately written (don't watch My Cousin Vinny after being law school, you'll overanalyze it). I experienced this third example recently.

I dreamt I was defense counsel for Simba.

A man spoke at length on Simba's alleged transgressions. He said that Simba was a traitor and should be beheaded. I rose in defense of Simba and claimed that Scar had poisoned the pride's mind while Simba was away. Simba was only gone because, while at the scene of a crime that he thought was his fault, he fled under persuasion of what he perceived to be his wise uncle speaking wisdom. Scar's ulterior motive was to ascend to the throne, which even Simba received a whiff of when Scar said, "Simba, it's to die for." This statement was made when his uncle prepared Simba for a trap, which Simba thought was a surprise from his father, the deceased Mufasa. Because Scar had engaged in a conspiracy to kill the king and carried it out, he and his accomplices (Shenzi, Benzi, and Ed) should be put to death.

We all know how this tale ends. no pun intended.

Visiting a Park of a Different Green: My Trip to the Proposed Site of the NYC Islamic Community Center

2010-08-28T00:18:00.016-04:00

I took the E train down from Penn Station. It was a 14 minute ride. As each stop passed, I became a little more excited at what awaited. After what seemed like ages, the train announcer finally announced, “Last stop, World Trade Center.” Hearing those three words, “World Trade Center”, at the site felt so different than when I heard them thrown around on the news so often. I was in lower Manhattan, the zone that shook so many years ago. World. Trade. Center.

I walked up the stairs and out of the subway system. I had to blink, squint, and adjust to the daylight. I spun around a little, looking for Park Place; instead, I found the gated walls encompassing the hallowed ground of the Twin Towers. I had visited the area a few times after 9/11, but each time had been as a non-New Yorker. But now I have lived in NY for three years. Seeing Ground Zero felt very different now, a scar on the skyline of a horrifying past.

I found Park Place easily enough, it was a complete 180 turnaround from Ground Zero. The road signs were labeled very clearly, letting me know which block would hold 51 Park Place, the site of the proposed Islamic Community Center. And so, I set off on my walk, anxious to see this controversial piece of property. I counted down the building numbers and closed in on 51; dodging cigarette smokers along the way.

And I walked past the place.

I nearly completely walked past the place had it not been for a few people holding signs and some others taking pictures. Otherwise, it is a completely nondescript, rundown eyesore.

I turned around to look at the building opposite Park51. There is an office building across the street, looks like a business version of a sweatshop. Park51 itself is very dilapidated. The paint is peeling, graffiti scattered on it, the “Burlington Coat Factory” logo is only visible due to the faded letters surrounded by dirt and grime.

One lady held up a sign with my name on it. I asked her if she was my limo driver. No luck. The sidewalk is chalked with “love thy neighbor”, “Learn the facts”, and “www.park51.org”.

This extremism is too much for me.

Speaking of extremists, half a block down there is an Amish Market. The Amish, man, they’re the extremists!

Forced to wear hijab at an early age!

I stood in front of the Amish Market at the corner of Park and West Broadway. I turned a full 180 and saw Ground Zero. Three cranes are visible, like skeletons of Brontosaurs. But Brontosaurs were never real. They were actually the bodies of Apatosaurs combined with Camarasaur heads born of a rivalry between two paleontologists! HILARTACULAR!

I walked two blocks to Ground Zero from the Amish Market. Along the way, I passed two halal carts. These two halal carts were way closer to Ground Zero than Park51.

Have they no shame?

Fruit Shakes? More like 'Fruit Sheikhs'!

A man walked past me with a shirt saying “No Ground Zero mosque”. When I arrived at Ground Zero, sure enough, the man was correct! There was, indeed, no Ground Zero Mosque. But I did see a variety of other things. Century 21, a department store, has a big banner saying “Fall into Fashion at C21” which overlooked the entire Ground Zero. I found that majorly offensive, given that some of the victims plunged to their deaths on 9/11. There were numerous places to spend money and glutton oneself, but there were no spaces to just sit in silence and contemplate, reflect, or pray. A Christian nation and people committed gluttony mixed with sloth! That was offensive! I saw a lady picking her nose at Ground Zero. That was offensive. A pimp stood next to me while I stood at an intersection. I was offended!

Then I realized that everybody has the freedom to do whatever it was they were doing, from digging for gold to wearing some gold. All the things which offended me were entirely subjective, and had no roots which could be tied to justice. It reminded me of a law in Pakistan that says, "If you insult the honor of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of God be upon him), you will be put to death." Insult according to whom? Is there a person who can turn emotions into facts and judges accordingly? One would have to ask the person to see if he was offended and in this immediate example, the prophet Muhammad passed away over 1400 years ago. Too bad he didn't leave behind any teachings that could help in this matter and show that blasphemy is not punishable by the death penalty.

Oh wait. He did.

You can't deprive people of their life based on something subjective. (The word "life" can be interchanged with any other human right) Why?

Because the fact is that there are four types of people: those who are over-sensitive, those who are sensitive, those who are under-sensitive, and my father. But even THOSE categories are subjective! We cannot act on them to set any standard aimed at one group of people because this does not mete out equal justice for it has no basis in fact and cannot break down into elements which can be applied to all.

I walked the two and a half blocks back to Park51 with this in mind.

There were about 12-15 supporters out front. 3 or 4 were Muslim.
But all were definitely supporters of American values.

A lady approached me and asked if I was a journalist. I replied, “Kind of.” She asked if I was religious. I said, “Yes.” She asked if I was Muslim. I said, “Yes.” She then asked if I knew the story of Lazarus and his supposed resurrection. She did not care if I did not believe it, just if I knew it. I said, “Yes.” She then said, “For all the Christians that oppose this building, they need to become firm in their faith. The resurrection will happen no matter where the mosque is located.” Although she pretty much told me that she believed I was going to Hell, I agreed with her logic.

I proceeded inside and was greeted by a tall, strong, African-American brother. He asked, “Can I help you?” I responded, “Assalamo Alaikum,” (peace be upon you) and extended my hand. He took it and responded with a hearty, “Walaikum salam warahmatullah wabarakatahu.” (peace be upon you and the mercy and blessings of Allah). I said, “I just want to check out the mosque.” He replied, “It is right down over there, just take off your shoes.” So I took off my shoes and went into the prayer area. There were a number of pillars in the prayer area. Other than that, the room was totally empty of any object (except for a few Qurans on a shelf, a prayer mat, and numerous carpets in rows) and had bare walls. Perfect. I could not even tell I was in New York City. I could not even hear the hustle of the NYC rush hour. I prayed my late afternoon prayer and offered a prayer for whatever is best (what a subjective prayer). I left the area with another hearty exchange of “salaams” with the doorman.

I left Park51. A non-Muslim man was standing outside in support of the center. When he saw me enter the outdoors, he offered me the biggest, most genuine smile.

I had never seen somebody so genuinely happy to see another exercising his freedom of religion. It was comforting amidst the rat race that surrounded us.

...then I ran to the subway because, hey, it's New York and I had a train to catch.

Faith Wars under Class Wars

2010-08-26T13:26:00.001-04:00

As a student who just entered his final year of law school, I can still mildly alternate between the way I used to think and how I currently think. Before law school, it tended to be about emotions, passions, and just doing what seemed to be the right thing. But after law school, all that stuff is secondary. First and foremost, one has to grasp the facts and grasp them chronologically.

Chronological problem:
What came first: the chicken or the egg?
Who cares? They're both delicious.

And be sure to grasp the facts accurately. Over history, we have had the industrial age, the bronze age, the gold age (see: Michael Phelps Olympics 2008), and now the information age. The age of information gives us information literally at our fingertips. Literally.

People dive in to get the smartest phones to get the internet, yet, this information powerhouse that is the worldwide web (WWW) might be underused. People have begun to congregate around one or two news sources and derive all information from them. This is dangerous because it does not teach something else I learned in law school thought: know both sides of the case.

There are two major sides to the NYC Islamic Community Center (ICC). Over the past few weeks, I have noticed that those who are versed in looking at both sides have supported the ICC's development. Most recently, this includes the NYC Bar Association. Additionally, other lawyers have spoken about the issue.

William J. Honan, the executive partner of Holland & Knight, which in 2001 had its office a block from the World Trade Center, said many of the firm's staff lived through "that horribly traumatic day, but that was the work of terrorists and that is not what we are talking about here."

The most famous attorney to speak on the issue was President Obama, who supported the building of the ICC, but the politician in him was quick to bring up uncertainty regarding location. However, there are exceptions to the rule, and in this case, another well-known attorney, Rudolph Giuliani, has spoken out strongly against the ICC.

On the other side of the class war, we see the construction workers, laborers, Union members pledging to not work on the construction of the ICC.

"There were construction workers killed on 9/11 and many more who got horribly sick cleaning up Ground Zero," Coletti said. "It's very emotional."

As evident, the majority of workers are engulfed in an argument based on passion and emotion. Of course, there are exceptions to that rule as well.

"Hundreds of guys here are wearing stickers as a sign of protest, but I'm on the fence about it," said Frank Langan, 50, a site superintendent from Queens working at Ground Zero.
"It's a tough debate," he said. "I sympathize with workers' position, but at the same time, you can't single out all Muslims because of a small number of terrorists."

So, we see a trend where both sides are weighing in heavily where they are expected to stand. But the amount of misinformation in this debate has essentially kept the working class focused on the "emotional argument". The "emotional argument" never focuses on the Muslim victims of 9/11, never focuses on the mission statement of the ICC, and, worst of all, it never focuses on the fact that the world is watching the actions of Americans very closely as we increasingly become torn on this manufactured story.

Chronological problem:
What came first: the freedom of speech or the freedom of religion?
Who cares? They equally coexist...

...just like we should.

Blogust 22, 2010

2010-08-22T16:11:00.005-04:00

The 3L year has finally started and it will end very rapidly. This is one of the certainties of life.

- I will not have enough time to study.

- I will not have enough time to finish my work.

- I will not have enough time to have enough time.

This is something I have learned to accept. Which is why in the time I have, I do the best work I can possibly do, and I encourage others to do just go all in instead of biding your time. Because, guess what, you won't have enough time.

---

Currently, there are two "news items" that have sparked massive debates and have thrust Islam into the spotlight. I refer to the NYC Islamic Cultural Center and 1 in 5 Americans being stupid. I mean, 1 in 5 Americans believing Obama is a Muslim. I will address the former only because the latter is so ridiculous that, oh bother, I am addressing it!

Quick, change the subject!

The NYC Islamic Cultural Center is an Islamic YMCA. That is all it is. A YMMA. Young Muslim and Muslimah (female form of Muslim) Association. It sounds like "yummy". Which is great because it will have a culinary arts school in there. Oh, right, it will also have two floors for praying.

The cool thing about a Muslim place of worship is that it is completely void of any images, idols, pictures, empowering scents, music, etc. It allows you to be before you and your God. So, all are welcome to pray within a mosque and they can do so without there being a "Star and Crescent" hanging over them, without having to impress members of the opposite sex (mosques tend to be separated by sex), and without hearing any chanting/etc (except for when the Muslims gather to pray and recite Quranic verses).

YMMA (I am going to call it this from now on) is located a couple blocks from where the Twin Towers once stood. People are offended. But I think the YMMA is more a beacon for peace. People think otherwise and say that the building will be a trophy for the Taliban. I feel like the building will be

more of a statement, "Yeah, the terrorists claimed to be followers

of Islam, but guess what, that

isn't Islam. The people who died that day died as a result of extremists, not as a result of a faith

that seeks to search and destroy. Come join us and find out more about Islam. And while you're here, play a little basketball, maybe try this quiche I just made. It is yummy."

So really, the debate is just coming from people who "learned all they needed to know about Islam on 9/11" not taking that step forward and learning what the other side has to say. I read a book called "Muhammad: A Biography of the Prophet" by Karen Armstrong a

few years back and really enjoyed it. She provides a well-researched historical look at Muhammad (peace be upon him) and Arabia before, during, and after his life. She has since written another biography which I look forward to reading to. Well, you know,

when I have some time.

Old-School Rules

2010-02-22T21:22:00.002-05:00

When I was a child, talking in a library was sacrilege. We would whisper quieter than the gentle wind, which could not be felt but could only be seen through its effect on the dandelions. Yet, we would whisper this way all the while looking over our shoulders, thinking the Librarian would come and throw us out and revoke our library cards, preventing us from ever checking books out again.

But now, people talk all over the library. The library is now just a big ol place to keep books that nobody reads. A place to talk on a cell phone in between library aisles. A place to hold conversations in a room full of people studying, without regard for them. Library.

Library.

Why, Barry?

Why?

Mid Law-School-Life Crisis

2009-10-01T10:36:00.002-04:00

I can feel it coming; this mid law-school-life crisis. Soon, half of my journey through law school will be complete. Then I'll be over the hill. But will it be downhill from there? I can already guess that this will never get any easier. But just because something is easier does not mean it will be more enjoyable.

To truly succeed in law school means to love learning. One has to love learning new things and researching to really feel the success of school. Otherwise, this is three years of torture. There are some out there who love law school. Others, like myself, are not too keen on it.

For those who love law school, there is a relatively good chance they might see themselves back in law school after graduating, either for the LLM or finding a job as a professor of law. The world of law may not be for them. That is because law school offers a safety net where one is protected from the outside world. In law school, one has to research topics that will not be presented before a judge or drastically change the life of a person. Some people cannot handle that type of pressure.

For those who do not like law school but know that it is a means to an end, there is a good chance you will enjoy the practice of law because it is so vastly different from the study of law. Instead of looking at the art of others, you have a chance to recreate the art yourself. Justice Stevens created art with a horsehair paintbrush and oil on canvas. Justice O'Connor created art with a paintbucket and a brick wall. You then have a chance to make your own new art by taking those previous paintings and applying the relevant paints and brushes to your scenario. That is how I see it. And that is what I cannot await!

But for now, back to getting hit by that crisis.

1L Omniscient

2009-09-01T23:18:00.003-04:00

I see these new students with their, literally, bright and shiny faces. Their eyes are wide. The girls are wearing make up and brand new outfits. They expect law school to be something that I have long since forgotten.

They are in for a huge punch to the face.

I see them and I cannot help but feel so miserable for them. I, and the other upper-level students, know what is about to hit them. And they do not have a clue! It can only be described as the longest running hazing ritual in all of America.

I want to do something to help them but I cannot just barge into their life and give advice freely. Nay, they will see soon enough. I don't want to seem 'preachy' and I tell you that I do not intend the following in any attempt at preaching, rather it is more just a thought. I feel like this is why God doesn't just come in and save the day with a touch of a thought. I could easily approach people and guide them through the whole thing but what good would that do for them? This would be bad for them! That is why God lets us all do what we gotta do because that is how we will better ourselves. Sure, we can ask for help, no problem. We know what we have to do, we know where we have to go, the path to that end is where we'll need help. And the help is available. All we have to do is ask. Of course, I hope the reader does not think I am comparing myself to God or vice versa, I am merely attempting to establish a parallel between the metaphysical and the physical.

I remember being at the student club fair. I could see the Law Review table a few stalls down. Loads of students had of course heard the 'prestige' offered by joining the 'elite' law review. So they flocked to it like it was the new Mecca. All of them with eyes focused on the prize of being in the top ten percent, getting a spot on law review, and then getting that corporate law job with all the money to make it all worthwhile.

But they don't know what it means for 'it all to be worthwhile.' They have barely licked the iceberg! All of them will realize the enormous workload on their shoulders (the good ol backpack and laptop bags), many of them will fade away from the dream (it is good to wake up), and the rest will literally be just a tad bit crazy enough to do that extra work (get that extra line on the resume).

I don't have anything against those who make an attempt for the prestige. I was nearly crazy enough to apply for one of the journals myself. What it comes down to is that I am not gunning for that big firm job, I am not shooting for money; I'm here to simply give meaning to the words 'life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness' for those who have been surrounded by death, slavery, and been pursued by malice.

I am crazy enough to do that.

Second Day, Second Year

2009-08-25T21:57:00.003-04:00

So first year is behind me. Far behind me. What can I say about it, three and a half months later?

It was like being on a roller coaster that pulls you backwards up the ramp so you can stare at what should be your impending death. You imagine a tragic scene over and over worthy of a part in a movie as you are slowly pulled back. And then, at the height of the incline, you hear the CLICK and everything is suspended for but a moment. Then, FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM, physics comes back into play and the train rushes down and up and around and then it all stops and you are slowly pulled up on a ramp. Things are different now because you can see the clear blue sky. This isn't the part where they tell you to exit the seat, but who cares, life is good for the moment. You hear the familiar CRICKLE CLACK CRICKLE CLACK as you are being pulled upwards, with hopes oh so high. It dawns on you that this track doesn't last forever. You realize this whole thing is about to happen again. But you've been on the track already, so you sort of know the way.

In but a moment, you will have to do the whole thing again, backwards. You try to remember what the ride was like. The latter part of the coaster was more recent than the beginning, so you work your way backwards. Starting with finals, how you studied for finals, what you read throughout the course, your study spot, the first day of school.

Ok, so you remember it now?

CLICK.

Working

2009-07-22T10:59:00.005-04:00

I wrote my first judicial decision the other day. That was pretty awesome. Of course, I am not a judge, so it wasn't "mine" per se. When I say "I wrote my", I mean it as a collective. I had a good group backing me in my pursuit of writing. The judge supported me. The secretary said I could do it without a problem. My fellow interns even offered to proofread my work and help edit it. I was very thankful for that kind gesture. It is always nice to see and work with good people in a seemingly cutthroat world.

Having written that, I now have two research assignments I am working on. Oh crap, I just ended the sentence in a preposition. Let's see, how to fix that and make it better. "I am working on two research assignments after having written the decision." Better? I suppose. It could probably be written better though, I'll leave that up to the reader.

Oh, so this talk of interns. Let me bring you up to speed. I'm working in a family court for a judge. This will last until the end of July. I have definitely learned a lot. Not so much as knowledge that will help me in a final, but I definitely learned how to behave in a courtroom and what not to do.

I have seen attorneys not show up, sign in and leave, not perform discovery, and only meet their clients when it the court date arrives. But I have also seen lawyers with a good command of the statutes, knowledge of the law, raising good objections, and defending their clients without wearing the clothes of the client. "The clothes of the client" is a phrase I learned during my internship. It is something a lawyer should never do. One time, an attorney became angry during a court proceeding and the judge admonished him to never wear the clothes of the client, that is, let your client be angry, you just have to use the law to rectify the situation because you do not have a personal stake in this.

Also, since I am working in law related stuff, this means that I'm still in law school i.e. I passed my first year! If you are entering or are in your first year of law school and need some sort of advice, you can ask me and I will help to 40% of my abilities. After all, I'm still in school so I have to reserve some of my abilities for myself.

Hope

2009-03-06T10:47:00.001-05:00

Let me tell you something. When you are in law school, when everything seems dim no matter how hard you have tried, there is one thing that you have left to do. That one thing is to visit your professors. Go to them and talk with them. Not talk to them, not talk at them. Talk WITH them. They are not so intimidating in person, although they still have an aura of respect about them. Tell them what you have done to improve yourself and what is not working. They will encourage you in such simple ways but those ways will have the most amazing impact. I did poorly in one of my finals. I felt utter defeat. When talking with my professor, he said, amongst other positive encouragements, "You are an intelligent student." That sent me flying in my head. Soaring. I felt like I could do so much better because I CAN do so much better. And you can too.

While in law school, there is a 90% chance you are not doing anything else. So make sure that you understand and realize that. Take into account each minute of each day and spend it fruitfully. If you are not sleeping or eating, go study. If you are not sleeping or studying, go eat or refresh your mind. If you are not studying or eating, go to sleep. Many times, I would find myself trying to keep myself awake in the late hours by playing online games. That helped NOTHING and I have learned to just use that time to sleep instead.

Once you have realized the value of time, then everything will fall into its place. But you have to work towards it. And if that is not helping, then be sure to meet with your professors and academic support. You are not dumb for going to academic support. That is the smart thing to do. Focus what you are weak in and attack it.

Jobbing the Hunt

2009-02-10T18:50:00.002-05:00

I do not know what other schools do to their first year students, and so I will tell you, oh dear reader, what my school does to first years. I do not use the word or any derivation of the word 'do' to imply something negative, rather I push your mind to infer that one does what the school tells them to do. The standard thus being set, I shall progress in a forward manner.

A regular semester includes a workload of 5 courses. Some people like to iterate these courses in terms of credits, however I do not look at the credit hours because trying to figure that out is like trying to put a diaper on a baby for the first, second, and third time. After the third time, proceed with duct tape and cotton balls. I digress. These five courses consist of torts, contracts, legal process, civil procedure, and criminal law/property I (criminal law in the fall, property I in the spring). Come the spring time, although we have the same number of courses, we are given an extra hour of class. This extra hour is an extra hour of possible Socratic Plato'ing.

Socrates: And so I divulge the pinnacle of political systems, that being...anybody...anybody? Ok, Plato, what be the pinnacle of political systems?

Plato: *CURSES POSEIDON* "Why doth thou always call on mine soul?"

Socrates: You're my only student at the moment, granite-face.

With that extra hour of class, there is an additional item that maximizes the agenda. This additional item is known as the job search. Tons of applications, cover letters, resumes, and memos to send out. And that occurs after one has found the places to which they would like to apply. The job search is very much a sixth course. If one does not finish this course as quickly as possible, the credit hours pile on as the semester goes by.

I should go prepare for my sixth course.

Contracting my Brain

2009-02-05T09:42:00.003-05:00

Today, I read a case that was about ten pages. I read it in a half hour. I was pleased with myself. Then I realized that I had just read ten pages of a judge defining "flood". That was it. "Hi, I am the judge, let me take you through the process of how to look up the word 'flood' in dictionaries, encyclopedias, and other sources. But hey, you don't have to take my word for it."

And then three kids by the name of Columbia, Webster, and Louis shared their own definitions of flood.

(sing to Reading Rainbow theme)
Water on the ground, look its flooding now
Take a swim, on a whim - Flooding Orleans

I can row anywhere!
Houses go as rivers flow - Flooding Orleans

I can get no coverage!
Take a swim, on a whim - Flooding Orleans

Flooding Orleans, Flooding Orleans, Flooding Orleans, Flooding Orleans

I am a terrible person.

Noah's Irk

2009-01-28T20:49:00.002-05:00

One thing that gets me SO HARDCORE BAD is when I am reading a case 4 times and not understanding it at all. And then, I will catch something I had been missing the whole entire time and it will all make sense! WHY! I have some sort of selective dyslexia perhaps.

On a sad note, a student I met last semester was dismissed. This guy was always studying hard. He was from China and so his english was not the best. He would be in the library just reading and taking notes all the time. He would be there before I got there and still be there when I left. He sat a few tables away from me. You know how it is, you sit in a seat so often that it becomes 'yours'. Eventually we talked and he was a really nice person. He reminded me of my little brother so, in my own self, I adopted him as such. Every time I would see him, I would say a little prayer for him, that he may increase in knowledge and that this may be easy for him. Whenever we talked, he was such a friendly, well-meaning person. Of course, law school is not for everybody, but he was trying so hard.

When I saw him this semester, I was excited to see him back! I found it odd that he had his jacket on in the middle of the day. He walked with me and stammered out that he had been dismissed. I stopped in my tracks. "What?" I asked. He repeated it, tears in his eyes. A brick wall fell on me. The first casualty of law school who I knew. I wished him the best in life and I sincerely meant it. I went into the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water. "Don't let that happen to you." I said to myself as I looked in the mirror.

I know he will work hard and do well in whatever endeavor he reaches, God willing.

I just hope I do well in wherever I reach as well

Addictions and Subtractions

2009-01-27T18:30:00.003-05:00

When you get caught up in the mistress that is law school, you need to have some sort of release. With the removal of much of your social network, your family/significant other disliking your lack of interest in them, and dead pets due to incredible neglect, you need to have some relaxation. As a result, some people become addicted to drugs as they try to find that release. Some become addicted to alcohol. Others become addicted to the thing they probably should not get addicted to, studying. In a recent issue of Student Lawyer, the editor essentially said to maintain your oxygen levels as you are submerged underwater. You will meet some people that will seem like a gleam of light when they are actually finding out all about you so they can chew you up and spit you out. Like this fish:

Others will not be as nasty. They will look different, but, once you get to know them, you will see that these people have great personalities. Unlike this blob fish:

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure the blob fish is a terrific and fascinating creature. And you should do whatever you can to network with all sorts of people. The blob fish, for example, is from off the deep coast of Australia and lives with other interesting fish. These fish could probably be what you want!

I am not addicted to fish. I have decided to become addicted to Spider-Man comics. I have been a fan of Spider-Man since I figured out that Superman was not even human, so being his fan was not the patriotic thing to do. Batman was just a guy with a belt and pointy ears, no superpowers. Because he had no "super"powers, how could he be a "super"hero? I rest my case. Spider-man, however, was just like me. Teenager, average problems, nerd, and all that. I am taking my love for Spider-Man (in essence, love for myself) by investing in the comics. I am starting with Marvel Civil War. This idea, this comic book event, is completely amazing. Superhero against superhero, battle after battle, trying to battle with reason but the stubborn nature leads to battles of epic proportions.

I yelled a long, terrible yell when *spoiler alert* Spider-man unmasked himself in front of a live television audience. I felt so betrayed. He had joined the wrong side. But *spoiler alert* he got his act together and joined the good side. *Phew*. There are a wide variety of artists involved in this, so there is always a different version of drawings. The storyline has a habit of being pretty fantastic. It is so awesome.

But then I remember that I have contracts homework. Crap.

President Barack Leonidas?

2009-01-20T21:23:00.001-05:00

Throughout President Obama's inaugural address, especially when he repeatedly said the word 'this', I wanted him to say "This is where we fight...This is where they die!"

And then the whole crowd went HOO! HOO! HOO!

Holy Hannah Montana

2009-01-15T15:16:00.002-05:00

So by some stroke of a sheer miracle, I passed my first semester at law school. This means more hell as I look to the desert ahead of me.

I was home for the winter break. I didn't get to hang out with my friends from long ago because I don't think I have any friends at the moment. Law school has sucked out my chi. Speaking of chi, I have started doing Tai Chi. I figure I should be in harmony with myself. It sounds nice. Plus, I need some sort of activity to do while at school, otherwise I am sitting on my rump.

One thing I know is that to learn, you don't just need a healthy brain, you need a healthy body as well. So if I am just sitting around and gaining weight, I am hurting my body! I must get active for at least a half hour a day. I think, with proper time management (and if I only had a car), I will be able to make the most of this semester, intrinsically and extrinsically.

Logical Flaws

2008-12-24T17:19:00.003-05:00

I like to think of myself as a logical, reasonable, and rational person.

That is why Christmas makes NO sense to me.

I wonder if people really know that Jesus was not born on December 25, but was actually born in the spring/summer time (there were baby sheep at his birth, what mammal gives birth in the winter?). Besides, December 25 was the pagan holiday of Saturnalia. The whole idea of having Christmas on Saturnalia was to make Christianity appeal to the pagans. And did the pagans bite? They sure did. But they made sure to leave a mark. And now, thousands of years later, the pagans have retaken Christmas as people leave the churches empty and the shops full, forgetting to worship God but worshipping the almighty (but fluctuating) dollar.

Happy Saturnalia folks.

There is a blood sucker on my arm and it is ticking me off

2008-12-17T11:04:00.003-05:00

I have certain pet peeves. One, and probably the only thing I will address in this entry (yes, there will be more pet peeve entries) is when people do not say, "Thank you." Especially when I hold the door open for them or go out of my way to ensure that it stays open for them. Not even a thankful nod or a gracious smile. They don't say thank you, but I say, "You're welcome" regardless. It makes me smile inside because I just subtlely owned them. Heh.

Also, regarding, "Thank you," I don't like when people don't say thanks when somebody says bless you. Practically everybody says thanks after somebody says it. Sure, there are those that don't say thanks and yes, I know, it is not automatically right just because the majority is doing it (cases in point: slavery, believing Jesus is a deity, stealing office supplies). But let's say that you just sneezed twice in a row and I said "bless you" both times after you sneezed, you can offer thanks no matter your faith from Agnostic to Zen. And then if you sneeze another time, you might hear me say, "Now you're asking too much." And we would laugh and we would have a connection for a second. But if you didn't say thanks at all then your continuous sneezes will just be awkward if you expect anything from me.

Or I could take my camera out and take pictures of you mid-sneeze and post them on Facebook*.

*I don't have facebook anymore, I disabled that ish.

Dark Circles and Light Naps

2008-12-15T19:49:00.002-05:00

There are few positive words to describe the physical transformation of people from the first day of orientation to today. There are many positive words (eventually) to describe the mental transformation of people from the first day of orientation to today. There are a lot less positive words to describe the emotional hardening of people from the first day of orientation to today.

I can feel my brain becoming more analytical and in tune with the concept of logic whenever something comes my way. I listen to the news and I only hear elements. I see interactions and I think of possible torts. I do not care much for people's opinions but rather how they are saying whatever it is that they feel necessary to say by opening their mouth.

People have dark circles under their eyes. Pretty much everybody does. Nobody gives a crap though. Because these dark circles show the amount one has been studying. And when game day arrives, then all will see if those dark circles were worth it.

Or if the person just straight up falls asleep during the test.

I ain't trading my kids for no nigga

2008-12-12T15:32:00.003-05:00

One thing unique about my law school is that it is, apparently, the only law school in the country that is situated right next to state and federal courthouses. It is an "out of the frying pan and into the fire" mentality. Another unique thing is the bus route around the area. Anybody who wants to be picked up from the law school is picked up after people are picked up from the courthouse. This means there are all sorts of people on the bus ride, usually a pissed off person who has been "screwed by the system". Today, on the bus, a woman was talking about being in some type of program for over 23 months. Somebody had apparently said that they were sentenced to the program for 7 months. The woman scoffed and said that was unrealistic. If somebody had a 7 month sentence to the program and only spent a maximum of 7 months in it, then it is like flying Delta Airlines and having a 100% on time rate. It just does not happen. The 23+ month program resulted in one's children being taken away. The woman said, "I ain't trading my kids for no nigga." I left the bus at that point. I am not sure what happened thereafter.

Finals and Chinese Food

2008-12-10T23:43:00.003-05:00

The core subjects kick off their marathon on Thursday with a good ol' Torts final. The day has been renamed Tortsday. All the test takers are tortoises. I have a craving for tortillas. All this studying will give me Tortet's Syndrome. Man the missile torts and fire when ready! These past couple sentences have been tortally lame.

I cannot wait until this Torts final is over because I am craving Chinese food and I think it would be enjoyable to eat after taking that final. This entry is short because DUHHHHHHH I should be sleeping now. Not blogging.

My fingers were negligent this entire entry. Each finger and thumb must pay their proportional damages. The jury would establish how much each finger owes by seeing how many of each letter has been typed because my fingers are good like that. And then my thumbs will have to pay for every space. Ha. Take that thumbs! ;a;a;aa;a;a;;a;a;a;a;a;a;a;a;a;a;a;a also, take that rinky dink pinky!

I'm just kidding, Fingers and Thumbs, don't fail me tomorrow.

Break Downs and Break Ups (sorry Reagan, not regarding walls)

2008-12-10T09:49:00.005-05:00

This entry is a continuance of finals season. Yesterday, I saw a girl have a severe breakdown. Major breakdown. I can understand because her computer broke down. And then her eyes went mad googly.

I have rarely seen googly eyes on people.

I didn't know which way she was looking but she was definitely looking down.

Along with finals season, especially this first time, comes the "holiday" season. (Arthur's sidenote: My name is not Arthur.) (Author's sidenote: I hate homonyms. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I have no malice for them, just as I have no malice for heteronyms.) (Seriously, author's sidenote: I have holiday in quotation marks because I don't believe a lot of people celebrate the days for their holy reasons. It is more of a sellabration. Person: "Oh? You are selling a bration? I will take three!" Look, I am not selling any brations. Person: "I'll give you $300 for each. My kids are dying to have one." I don't even think brations exist. Abrasions exist, though. I could give you abrasions by rubbing your skin with sandpaper, or perhaps rubbing your spoiled kids with sandpaper. Maybe I would smooth out their flaws. Or I could sandpaper my baseball bat and hit you upside the head, hoping to knock some sense into you because if you are celebrating Christmas then celebrate it for the right reasons [which are actually the wrong reasons historically, even religiously] but that is not for this type of blog. Just know that. There will be a test.)

Right, so the "holiday" season. People like to get festive all of a sudden. I do not know what festive means. I think it means "Here are some lights in front of my house. I will now chop a tree down from the outside, bring it inside, and let it die." Or perhaps it means, "Hi. I know you. I like you. Here is something I did not want so I am giving it to you with the gift receipt so that you can return it and keep the money. Unless you want me to give you $12.79 in an envelope."

But during finals season, nobody can be festive. Nobody can be jolly. Nobody can be solemn. Nobody can be jollemn. They are a glum un-jollemn. They are a . . . gollum?

So people yell. They get angry. Their nerves are at wit's end. Cracking gum, the wrong inflection in a voice, duty's owed to oneself, it all gets to people. And with all that happening on this end, the people on the other end of people's lives get agitated because they want to know what's wrong, they want to help, they want to be there in the student's life. But they cannot and, well, they should not (not from a distance, anyways). Relationships were never meant to be long-distance. If they are meant to be (like mine) then they will last. If not, then, well, I don't know. Tough. Make it a short-distance relationship. Do something about it. Law school consumes your life, it will. But once it ends (this semester at least), well, the break will be nice.

And we will repeat in May.

I can't wait.

Some Stress, No Z's, All Tests, No B's

2008-12-09T07:43:00.002-05:00

Ugh-nother day spent in the engorging embrace of my mistress, Leah B. Rary. She is suffocating me. Always asking "Where are you?" and "Why are you not in me?" and "Why do you only come over when nobody is looking? Are you ashamed of me?" LEAVE ME ALONE YOU VILE, PESTILENT WOMAN!

The study room is oddly warm and I am oddly sleepy. Well, it is not so odd because I have been here since the early AM. I don't even know what time. The sun was down and the stars were up. That is all I know anymore. The sun is a figment of my imagination for this month. I only see it from inside a room, through a plated glass window. I think the windows are made durable enough so that nobody can jump through them but, then again, the third floor has no bars from one jumping off and falling to the lobby below.

Negligent? I don't know anymore.

Becoming A Menace to Society

2008-12-08T12:58:00.006-05:00

My professor enjoys giving life commentary amidst his esoteric teaching. Today's lesson was to find enjoyment, entertainment, and fun through reading. The hidden subcontext was to throw out your television because, as my professor is apt to say, televisions are for stupid people.

For the marathon month of finals, I have taken to sleeping in the evening for a few hours and waking up at 1 or 2 AM and coming to the library and just staying there until classes.

Objective

2008-12-06T22:11:00.003-05:00

What do I hope to accomplish through this blog? I hope that this can be an outlet for me in which I can just type things related to being a law student with as little whining as possible. If you have gone through law school, you may remember the stress that you went through and the post-traumatic stress disorder that may have resulted as to why you tie a striped/dotted/solid/colorful noose around your neck everyday. If you are going through law school, you do not need to hear about another's whinings. If you are about to attend law school, I won't give away all the whinings. If you are thinking about law school, don't let this detract you; there is a terrific job waiting for you (probably). If you have no idea what you are doing here, welcome.

As a LegalSmeagol, I imagine I will go through fits of paranoia, fits of happiness, instances of feeling free, and hopeless realizations that I am a slave to the system.

It should be a terrific road, these next few years.

* * * * * *

Oh, by the way, I do have a life outside of law school.

hahahahah just kidding.

But seriously, kind of truth?

I am listening to Kanye West's new album and am enjoying it as I touch up my Civil Procedure outline. Um. Word of advice. Work on your outline throughout the semester as soon as your professor finishes a major subject heading. Seriously.

Or just learn the hard way, the most efficient way to learn.

Cheating on the Law

2008-12-04T11:15:00.005-05:00

I do not understand how people attempt to manage relationships while in law school. I further do not understand how people get into relationships while in law school. And not just with any person, but with a person from the same school. I guess they find somebody attractive and pursue it, not realizing that everybody in their year is their rival. And then, once in a relationship, what is the point? If you are paying tens of thousands of dollars a year to be in law school, are you paying all that to be mediocre? I highly doubt it. Essentially, being in a relationship while in law school means that somebody is being cheated on.

And that somebody is Lady Justice.

Who cares that she is blindfolded and won't see you? She'll sense it when you get that not so great grade.

How do I know this? Because I have enough trouble maintaining friendships, a relationship must be twice as hard! Why is that? That is because in law school, going to class is 30% of the battle. The rest of the 94% is reading, understanding, and applying. Oddly, if you have done the reading and the understanding, it is a tad difficult to automatically apply whatever it is that has been learnt. One has to turn to actively engage in doing the hypotheticals until their life becomes hypathetical.

Yes, yes, one should not let law school take control over their life, but it is pretty difficult to separate the two. And that is when the realization occurs that the student is now cheating on their loved one with Lady Law. And when the student's significant other ultimately realizes the neglect that results, he/she does not know what to do. He/she will try to get in more time with the student because of the emotional bond that is present in a relationship. That bond is pretty important. It is a fire that one must feed and stoke. If it is not fed, if the student thinks that the fire will burn on the ashen remains of what was, then the student is sorely mistaken.

It is a fine balance.

Especially come finals time when literally every breathing moment is dedicated to studying for finals and the extended blink, which has become the new method of sleep, is done solely out of necessary purposes to recharge.

Is anybody at fault in these situations? A person can be at fault, especially when he/she gets together while in law school with a fellow student. I do not agree with that. If you are going to get into a relationship, get with somebody where law would be the last thing on his/her mind. Otherwise, that sounds like a super boring life. So go for the girl you know back home, or find out more about the man that you know through a friend.

Because, after all, Lady Law is blind, she won't see you.

...for now.

The Memost Fun I've Had

2008-12-02T03:03:00.003-05:00

It is 3 AM. My memo is due in 12 hours. I'm pretty much done. I am only awake because I returned home from school just a bit ago. I came by taxi. I only had a twenty for an eight dollar ride. So I got twelve dollars in change...aka I have twelve one dollar bills. I feel mad rich.

* * * * *

In the final days and moments before memos are due and hopes are shattered, people start whispering what their memo has and questions are lightning bolted across classrooms by way of the almighty instant message. Of course, nobody really has a clue as to what is going on and so we are witness to the question conversation:

"How many cases did you have for the admiralty act section?"

"What admiralty act section? I don't think there was an admiralty act section. Wasn't this case about farming?"

"What do you mean there was no admiralty act section?"

"Wait, did I do the wrong research problem?"

and classic favorites such as:

"How big is your IRACtion? My IRACtion is so huge."

"What font size are your punctuation marks?"

"Don't you just hate *insert crime researched for way too long*"

I should be able to take any state case that dealt with my problem, look at the fact pattern, and instantly be able to tell if the crime was committed or not. Just like that. Now, all I have to do is multiply this times about 500 and I should be good for the BAR!

* * * * *

If the door doesn't hit you on the way out, the loans will.

Frozen in a Time Vortex

2008-11-30T22:25:00.003-05:00

My law school has a habit of teasing me. I will enter the school and be welcomed by warmth (it is pretty cold outside). But, hours later, when I am in the crux of my studying, BAM the air conditioning will turn on.

Regardless, I have lost track of time. There are no windows in the room where I study. The one clock is at my back and my computer's clock is hidden by the auto-hide taskbar feature. My taskbar is barely ever up because I have a kick-butt mouse set up to switch applications at the touch of a button. Hours fly by without my knowledge and the end-product is but a few sentences, a few edits, or a citation or two. I do not remember the sound of grass or the taste of sunshine. As Frodo said, I am naked in the dark. Come to think of it, there is some truth in the stated statements, albeit much is exaggerated. Maybe. Not sure what is/was/will be real.

Curse you, IRAC. Curse you, memo. I used to think that IRAC stood for Issue, Rule, Analysis, and Conclusion. It turns out, it stands for Intellectually Retarded, Analytically Crappy.

I just got out of a study session. We were reviewing for the upcoming Legal Process final. We tabbed the bluebook up. I am glad I started tabbing earlier in the semester, it was just so much easier finding the rules, etc. A common sense thing.

Speaking of time vortex, apparently scientists found one over the south pole. The story is years old but I find it fascinating to read about.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1104747/posts
I think time is very interesting. The concept of it all. Man attempts to have some sort of control of time by attributing a system of gears and hands to it and placing it around his wrist. Does he not know that such an act has in fact made time control him? His constant checking of time making sure he is on time. His constant checking of time to see if he has no time. His constant checking of time just to check any time. Before the invention of watches and clocks, before the invention of time, the only concept of time in the Arab world was signified by the words 'now' and 'later.' If something needed to be done, do it now. If not, eh, do it later! Watches are the collar and time is the leash that leads men too quickly to a place that is too boring because they did not enjoy the path to there.

Law school is definitely like that. 80-90% of the students are in their early twenties, the prime of their life. And what are they doing? Spending hour after God-forsaken hour learning the law. If I could be in an apprenticeship, I would much rather do that than this. I think.

I would definitely give it a try.

Closed Libraries Are Bad Libraries

2008-11-29T22:30:00.000-05:00

My law school's library is closed right now. It was closed all day. I can understand since my school is a Jewish affiliated school and they will want to be closed on the Sabbath, but not everybody in the school is Jewish. I'm not paying $35,000 a year to not be able to use my own school's facility. If you're gonna have a security guard in the building, you might as well make his job a little less redundant by opening the doors of the library and allowing students to study there.

Libraries are my elixir, living amongst microfiche enigmas, lessons awarding meaningful education...life at my ease.

First Year, First Entry

2008-11-26T17:55:00.000-05:00

Let's cut the bird droppings and get right into business. I am in law school. This is my first year. It is the end of November. This means that finals are here.

What am I doing to prepare? Well, I got rid of my Facebook.

Let me let that sink in.

Pretty intense, eh? I remember when the Dean said, during orientation, to get rid of our social networking websites. I thought, "Ha! What a joke! I will never get rid of my Facebook!" I guess that was the first sign of concern. Who knows how many hours I have poured into that thing. Even during classes. Yes, I am guilty of surfing the net during class sometimes. I'm working on it. I have toned it down. How? Fake interest. If I tell my brain I love contracts and find every word that comes out of the professor's mouth fascinating, then my brain decides to eat everything up.

My brain is very gullible.

And that ends my several minute self-imposed break from my paper that is due in six days. Maybe my entries will become awesome over the next three years and perhaps I will become a wonder of the legal world and be mentioned in Student Lawyer. I love reading that magazine. I feel like I am getting insider tips on things. It is like the Men's Health of the legal world.

Oh, the primary reason I created this was because somebody's cell phone rang in the library and it irked me off to no end. Don't people know library etiquette? Also, it irks me when people flirt in the library. I didn't know people got their socks off to library books.

Girl: "Oh my, all these people so focused and studying, I can feel myself just in the need to FLIRT!"
Guy: "Oh yeah, forget grades, I want to live in the moment! And you are cute so I will flirt it with you! And who knows, perhaps a relationship will develop, although it will be completely pointless because we are in the same year and we are rivals and you'll want to end up being this type of lawyer and I'll want to be that type of lawyer so when it comes time to get our job on....you know, that is too much thinking! Let's flirt!"
Me: (in my best Scottish accent) "How about you two quit getting your jollies off and become one of the literal-minded! Ye done nothing but whisper sweet nothings all evening and it has made me learn more about butterflies and sugarmuffins than personal jurisdiction."

If I fail out, I will find the flirters of law school libraries and throw things at them.

Good gravy chin-lickers!